I have lived in Japan for 11 years since 1996 and I would not be exaggerating to say that my mind has been shaped by many japanese customs and their way of life. Here are some ways that help me practice EQ

What is Trauma? And what makes recovery so hard? Read on to know more about how we process Trauma and what we can do to come out of it. According to the Mirriam Webster dictionary, Trauma is the Greek word for "wound". Although the Greeks used the term only for physical injuries, nowadays trauma is just as likely to refer to emotional wounds.

Consider this: A client applied for a job. And then spent days worrying about “How could have I have done it better?” She continued: “This thought went into my heart and caused an overload of self –blame: I wish I had taken more time to reflect and Why do I always do this?”

Uncertainty is the biggest driver of worry. We can drive ourselves crazy

Our bodies react to stress instinctively. But we are rarely tuned into our physical response to stress until it becomes a health issue. Read on to understand the response and how you can mitigate the impact by 5 simple techniques. This is especially important during the prolonged uncertainty caused of the pandemic.

Whenever I saw my kids fight– I could predict at what point the interaction would become explosive. Although I tried, no amount of warning could stop them, not once they started arguing. It ended frequently in tears and time out. Patterns of behaviour that are self -defeating are awfully difficult to stop and often lead to trouble. The “trouble” could be a fight, distancing, withdrawal or more serious consequences that hurt you – loneliness, sorrow, depression or anxiety.

Unless you are living alone like a hermit in the mountains, you have done things you have regretted later on. Who hasn’t? Other people’s behaviour may look perfect, but the reality is most likely that its far from. So, when I reacted rather aggressively and lashed out at a loved one, I was doing something I never would have done had I been in my senses. But at that moment, my emotions of anger and injustice got the better of me

Recently, I arranged to have lunch with an old friend – she cancelled literally 5 minutes before, I was already waiting in the restaurant for her– instead of feeling affronted that she did not value my time, I listened calmly to her explanation. I was shocked to hear that she was undergoing an intense grief reaction and this restaurant had triggered her sadness and memories. Unable to face that, she cancelled the lunch as she was parking her car and went home to cry.

TRUST. A very powerful experience…It is a state or a firm belief in the reliability of something or someone.

We are wired to connect. It is built into our DNA. It allows us to form meaningful, deep and long -lasting relationships and is a vital social tool. Eric Erickson, a noted psychologist noted that very early in our development, we experience the world from the framework of trust. It is our default option

Ever ridden a roller coaster that scared and excited you at the same time? Its how I felt last year, when I signed for a course quite blindly—in the sense that I had no idea what I was getting into.  I was learning something new after a very long time.  It was blended learning, Classroom sessions, Webinars, digital assignments, recordings…not how I learned 30 years ago!

Have you ever been in a situation where a friend was confiding in you and you thought you knew exactly what she was going through and said so to her. “I get it, I know exactly how you feel”. And your friend says, “ Well, I don’t know how you know exactly how I am feeling. You’ve never been diagnosed with cancer”. Huh?

The word “Change” wreaks havoc on us – it immediately puts us into a stress mode – we end up resisting it in a variety of ways… the inevitable flight, fight or avoid response. I have had some big changes in my life.

Just recently, I went through this experience of being told “who I am” I will admit it hurt and I can honestly say I began to believe their “truth”. How many people go through a similar experience? How often do we fall into believing what others say about us? How often do we find ourselves barraged by a judgement or criticism?

Joe is a 34 year old IT specialist working in a high pressure environment. He has had a negative experience with a  boss who  “did not really like him”.  He reacted with  nervousness , feeling edgy and with no feedback loop,  lost the motivation to be his best. In his current job, he is careful to cultivate a more personal relationship with his boss.

I often hear people complain “ I really have no time to relax”. “ I am too busy to even sleep or eat”. “ Not sure where the year has gone”. Often, action steps centers around –time spent on social media, change of jobs or a passive acceptance of life as is. Rarely is there an enquiry around emotions.